Violating Human Rights in the Name of Safety

The night is dark and full of terrors... the day is bright and filled with promise and joy...

 

Today though is filled with smoke from the forest fires enveloping British Columbia and frustration. Yesterday was Cobe's first day of high school. I was both nervous and excited. Nervous because I 'Why I Chose to Unschool My Son') and I was excited for my baby to start a new journey in his life. Cobe was Unschooled for 3 years and this summer he decided to go to the local high school. He wanted to be with his boys and meet girls. Fair enough! It was his choice to leave public schooling and it was his choice to return.
don't like what school was created for and what it does to the children (for more information about that, read this article

 

My guides told me that he is there to learn; not like Math or English although yes, he will learn that but he is meant to learn about people and how to interact with them. Just for clarification, I speak to my spirit guides on a regular basis. Anyways, they told me that the unschooling was fabulous and I should be very proud but he needs to be out in the world now. Deep breath... They told me my lessons have given him more awareness than most kids his age, which is awesome! They told me it's another success for me. I have many but that is a side story. Although knowing that helped me to get out of my funk. In my last post (The Dark Night of the Soul) I wrote about the funk I was in. The funk has cleared and I feel good (cue James Brown) aside from what I witnessed yesterday...

 

A System Forcing Kids To Obey Through Fear

 

One of the reasons (among many) I agreed with Cobe's decision to leave public schooling was because of how the school treats children. I parent with the peaceful parent approach. I treat my son as my equal. He is on journey, that journey being life. I am on the same journey. The difference is I have 17 years more experience on this journey than he does. Does that mean that I have it all figured out? Hell naw! I do have a vast amount of knowledge I've acquired over the years but I ain't got it all figured out and I will never pretend I do; especially to him. It's fuckin ridiculous to see the way parents treat their children sometimes. Like they are above them saying things like, "I'm the boss," "Do as I say," "Children should be seen and not heard," and on and on. They act like because they are older, they are better, more established and have the right to be authoritarian like that is the best way to parent. Because that's how they were parented, like their parents before them and so on. In my opinion, it's the laziest way to parent. The most amusing part is when I know the parent personally and they are not a good person... at best. And yet, to their kid they act like a God. I'm almost choking on my tea right now chuckling about it.

 

The school is no different. Instead of having a set of values and principles, there are rules; a million of them. Which of course causes kids to rebel. It's also is a terrible way to teach. And I wouldn't even call them rules; I'd say they're more like demands that must be obeyed or else there will be grave consequences. It's the old fear based system to control. It's old and fuckin outdated. It's still in place I imagine because most parents agree with it because that is the very basis of their parenting. That or they don't have the balls to speak up and say it needs to be changed.

 

As I was reading Cobe's agenda the other day (the parents were told we had to read the first 20 pages of it) I noticed that most of it was a list of demands and if not followed, would have serious consequences including getting the RCMP involved. Really? Them? Gimmie a fuckin break! Yea, lets get the cops involved and start them in the criminal "justice" system early. Kids make mistakes, it's part of learning and growing. Our society is so fucked. Some of the rules included dressing appropriately and not wearing anything that will offend anyone although they didn't specify what was appropriate or not. It also said the clothing can't be distracting. They didn't need to specify that for me to know what that means. It means girls wearing clothing that is "distracting" for guys. When I was in high school there was a dress code for girls. Like spaghetti strap tank tops. Spaghetti strap tank tops!!! If you wore that to school (because it was hot out), you'd have to wear this huge white t-shirt that stank because they never washed it. I mean, what about the guys? They wore these sexy jerseys, those were distracting. What about when they took those jerseys off to play hockey and they'd have a muscle shirt on underneath all dripping in sweat (fanning myself). Woo... those were definitely distracting. But the guys were allowed to wear whatever. Not only is school authoritarian and fear based, it's sexist.

 

Witnessing Kids Rights Being Violated In The Parking Lot

 

So, yesterday... Cobe was going to catch the school bus but as he was waiting, had to go to the bathroom. He asked if I could drive him instead so he could go before he went to school. I of course agreed cause it wasn't a big deal. He does his business and we head off. As we get close, you can see 100s (literally) of cars coming and going from the school. We had to wait in the left turn lane for like 15 minutes because people turning right wouldn't let anyone else go. It was nuts. So, finally we get to turn left and we're slowly creeping up the road leading to the school parking lot. As we were creeping, I noticed a cop car on the right side that was pointing at certain vehicles to pull over. I'm thinking, 'What the fuck is going on? A road block?' As I creep past, I noticed he was only pulling over students who were driving. I could feel heat forming in my chest and slowly rising up to my cheeks (which usually happens when I witness an injustice of some kind). He was asking for their drivers license and registration. There was a teacher or maybe the principal there helping him.

 

Now if you know anything about our rights as Canadian, you'd know that most road blocks infringe on our human rights. Being presumed guilty until proven innocent is not what Canada parades itself to be. You always hear the old saying, 'You are innocent until proven guilty' but this is not upheld. The issue of probable cause comes into to play. What is this officer's probable cause to pull over students heading into the school parking lot on their way to school? As a side note, I personally think road blocks are a waste of time and money. It's not preventing drinking and driving or keeping people safer. It just seems to be a money grab and people will do their best to not get caught. Either they know this and don't care or they're incompetent and should not have the kind of power they do.

 

Either way, I wasn't sure why they were pulling these students over and but I did know for sure it didn't seem right. So, after I got back home I called the school to find out exactly why they were doing that. The receptionist informed that it was a "tradition" and they do it to make sure the kids weren't drinking and driving because they were probably partying on the weekend. Ummm... what!? The receptionist was kind of laughing about it like it was funny. She also stated, "they're doing it to make sure seatbelts are being worn, there isn't too many kids in the car because they have their N," etc.

 

When you have your N driver's license, that stands for 'New' or 'Novice'. Having this label gives you a multitude of rules such as you're only allowed one person in the car who is not related to you. You're also not allowed to drive people who are underage, including if it's your kid's friend. If you break these rules, you can lose your license. For some, driving is their very livelihood, especialy when you live in a rural area like here in the Cowichan Valley. Regardless, it's fuckin ridiculous. They say it's about safety. Like they do about all things that cause us to have our rights taken away. When it comes to driving though, anything can happen, no matter how experienced your driving is, driving is always a risk.

 

So back to the receptionist... I said that what they are doing is violating the students rights and it's discrimination. None of the parent drivers were being pulled over. Adults break the rules all the time yet we were not being checked on. The probable cause (as the receptionist put it) was that they were young and because they were young, that automatically means that they won't be following the rules, are drinking and driving on a Tuesday morning and aside from that... it was "tradition."

 

I was flabbergasted. They are teaching the kids that not only are they guilty until proven innocent because they are young but that it's perfectly okay to infringe on their rights and assume such things in the same of "safety." Fuuuck that. What a fuckin joke! The receptionist didn't give two shits that me as parent was concerned about this. She said if I had a problem with it I could call the officer who was doing it and discuss it with him. I declined (because what good would that do? Cops already infringe on our rights all the time and I'm sure the officer is happy to do it to meet his "quotas") and asked who gave the okay to do it. She told me the Principal did and said I could talk to him but he wasn't available so I could leave a voice mail. Mmm, no thanks. First off, I could cause a ruckus about it but the thing is, I don't want my out-spoken, justice driven, rights upholding nature to infringe on Cobe's time there. If the principal asked who my kid was, I wouldn't want to tell him. So then what would I do? Hang up? Pretend there is bad connection all of a sudden? I want Cobe's time there to go smoothly. I already know the Principal and I will not agree. It's not like he'll change his mind about their annual "tradition" in the same of safety. I know when and where to pick my battles and if it could affect Cobe, I'll quiet the warrior in me for his sake.

 

After I got the phone, I was fuckin pissed. I grumbled about it, laughed at the fucked upness of it and shook my head that our world is filled with such tyranny at every turn it seems. I immediately had to start doing self-care. I can't let all my growth go out the window because I'm feeling pissed off at what I witnessed. I was sticking up for the students. I was speaking out for them to the receptionist
because who else will? All the systems of the world are broken and collapsing. The natural disasters we have faced recently (hurricane Harvey and Irma, the entire west coast is on fire, flooding in India and other places to name a few) are a reflection of these systems falling. They have been broken for a long time, if they were ever whole to begin with. Our Mother Earth is growing as we grow. We are birthing a new way it's going to be chaotic. It seems like there is so much darkness right now because light is being shined on parts of it that were hidden in shadow.

 

As a mother, I am just concerned for my son. He is growing up in this place. The best I can do is keep moving forward and focus on the solutions. There are many solutions I'm working on and all will be resolved... in time.

 

Until next time... deep breath...